Clarisse blows air out of her cheeks, trying to think of the right way to put this.
"They have all this power over everybody, and once you have enough of that, you get scared someone's going to take it away from you somehow. That's the only thing you have to worry about anymore, basically. Losing control."
She's thought about this before, a lot. Especially during the years when Luke was trying to do exactly that, and overthrow the gods. That must have scared them shitless, knowing their kids could be a real threat to them.
Oh. Abby's laughter fades off into little gasps and a sore tummy, and then she shuts up entirely. Cuz that's not funny.
"Shit."
She thinks for a moment, then says, "It- the leader of my group back home was like that. Scared of losing control. He was under the control of the military when everything went to shit right at the start, and then he broke away from them to make his own group." She's jiggling her leg restlessly right next to Clarisse, thinking, "In the end it was exactly like the military? We just ended up doing the same shit as them. For land."
Well, it's not funny, but something about it strikes Clarisse as amusing. She's thinking about the ancient Greeks at war thousands of years ago, and Abby's group at war in 20-whatever. All that time passing, but everybody still fighting over the same dumb shit. There's a kind of humor in that.
Also, the way Abby's jiggling her leg has Clarisse's head feeling like it's pressed against one of those massage chairs they have at malls back home. She smiles.
"People never change. Is that when you met your friend, when you were with that group?"
Abby has to admit that she's right. Keeps jiggling her leg though. Talking about this shit- it's not hard, she can do it, it's whatever- always makes her nervous. Peeling back layers, exposing what's beneath: it's fucked up. Hope you like it!
"Yeah. Did I say we were fighting each other? His group and my group, I mean." She probably implied it, with the whole they tried to hang me spiel. God, it's like she's got word vomit, it keeps coming up. "After he saved me, we started our own group, and nobody liked that. At all."
Clarisse's tone is hard to read—not judgmental, not impressed. She's a little jealous, actually. Of Abby's ability to decide she didn't like something, was tired of it, and... let go.
"Uh huh." She's staring at the ceiling. "And now I'm here."
On a side again... feeling weird about it sometimes, but mostly enjoying the experience. Mostly missing Lev. The conversation has come around in a neat little circle, she thinks. Her stomach rumbles, and she sighs, says, "And I'm hungry." A terrible fate.
It hasn't occurred to Clarisse until now to want food, but now that Abby's brought it up, she decides she could definitely eat. She lifts her head and struggles into a sitting position.
"Let's go get food."
Maybe next time she'll remember to stock up on something good before she gets high.
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"Uh, I wouldn't say it's common? But it's happened. More likely they'd just kill you."
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"They were the one who made you, so shouldn't they be the one taking responsibility? Not the kids fault for being- tricked out, or whatever."
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Clarisse blows air out of her cheeks, trying to think of the right way to put this.
"They have all this power over everybody, and once you have enough of that, you get scared someone's going to take it away from you somehow. That's the only thing you have to worry about anymore, basically. Losing control."
She's thought about this before, a lot. Especially during the years when Luke was trying to do exactly that, and overthrow the gods. That must have scared them shitless, knowing their kids could be a real threat to them.
no subject
"Shit."
She thinks for a moment, then says, "It- the leader of my group back home was like that. Scared of losing control. He was under the control of the military when everything went to shit right at the start, and then he broke away from them to make his own group." She's jiggling her leg restlessly right next to Clarisse, thinking, "In the end it was exactly like the military? We just ended up doing the same shit as them. For land."
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Also, the way Abby's jiggling her leg has Clarisse's head feeling like it's pressed against one of those massage chairs they have at malls back home. She smiles.
"People never change. Is that when you met your friend, when you were with that group?"
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"Yeah. Did I say we were fighting each other? His group and my group, I mean." She probably implied it, with the whole they tried to hang me spiel. God, it's like she's got word vomit, it keeps coming up. "After he saved me, we started our own group, and nobody liked that. At all."
Why is she sniggering it's not funny
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Clarisse's tone is hard to read—not judgmental, not impressed. She's a little jealous, actually. Of Abby's ability to decide she didn't like something, was tired of it, and... let go.
no subject
On a side again... feeling weird about it sometimes, but mostly enjoying the experience. Mostly missing Lev. The conversation has come around in a neat little circle, she thinks. Her stomach rumbles, and she sighs, says, "And I'm hungry." A terrible fate.
no subject
It hasn't occurred to Clarisse until now to want food, but now that Abby's brought it up, she decides she could definitely eat. She lifts her head and struggles into a sitting position.
"Let's go get food."
Maybe next time she'll remember to stock up on something good before she gets high.