It makes her think of nights Manny was away sleeping in somebody else's bed so Nora would occupy his and bring Mel with her, maybe Leah too if she could bear to be dragged away from Jordan for that long. Leah always had gossip. Nora pretended not to care but had a million questions ready and Abby found it fascinating how easy it was for Leah to talk about her own sex life, about what Jordan did that made her scream or whatever. She hated talking about that stuff. About who she was looking at behind Owen's back.
Clarisse is looking at her. Abby was looking too but not focusing and now she sits up straight. She tosses her braid over her shoulder almost carelessly and exhales, settling. She can't think of anything to say. Her and Clarisse used to be able to sit in silence together all the time, doing something individually at the same time, and it was never weird. Now Abby feels like she can't let things be quiet between them, she needs to be talking or moving.
She makes herself be still. Does Clarisse feel like this around her now too? She can't tell. Maybe she's the only one being crazy.
They're supposed to be friends. Clarisse doesn't want to lose her as a friend.
Abby's heart is thumping. She says, "Clarisse," lets the rest of it stick in her throat. In the training yard Clarisse said touch me like it was the easiest thing in the world to ask for what she wanted and Abby wants to say that now, she wants to be brave and crazy. But she doesn't want to be the one who ruins what they are.
no subject
It makes her think of nights Manny was away sleeping in somebody else's bed so Nora would occupy his and bring Mel with her, maybe Leah too if she could bear to be dragged away from Jordan for that long. Leah always had gossip. Nora pretended not to care but had a million questions ready and Abby found it fascinating how easy it was for Leah to talk about her own sex life, about what Jordan did that made her scream or whatever. She hated talking about that stuff. About who she was looking at behind Owen's back.
Clarisse is looking at her. Abby was looking too but not focusing and now she sits up straight. She tosses her braid over her shoulder almost carelessly and exhales, settling. She can't think of anything to say. Her and Clarisse used to be able to sit in silence together all the time, doing something individually at the same time, and it was never weird. Now Abby feels like she can't let things be quiet between them, she needs to be talking or moving.
She makes herself be still. Does Clarisse feel like this around her now too? She can't tell. Maybe she's the only one being crazy.
They're supposed to be friends. Clarisse doesn't want to lose her as a friend.
Abby's heart is thumping. She says, "Clarisse," lets the rest of it stick in her throat. In the training yard Clarisse said touch me like it was the easiest thing in the world to ask for what she wanted and Abby wants to say that now, she wants to be brave and crazy. But she doesn't want to be the one who ruins what they are.