It's weird that this is the first time Abby is doing this for somebody else. Other people have done this for her, approached her grief slow as if it were a wild animal, hands out. She wonders if Owen felt like this when he was trying to coax her to stand up from the slick hospital floor, clumsy and useless.

It's achy in her throat, this harsh sadness, and she hates that she doesn't have anything other than words right now. Nobody wants to hear shit like 'I'm so sorry' but it's really all there is. This isn't like when Yara was killed and she had to keep Lev moving no matter what, pushing him through the loss; her and Clarisse aren't running for their lives, they're just sitting in a tent with Ellie's stuff left in it. They're alone.

"She's gone."

She swallows and tries to say it again in another way, as if Clarisse won't believe her otherwise. "She went back."